The 100th Post

I have now managed 100 posts without any (or much) feedback. This may be a record. Well, at least, most people would have given up by now.

Statistics

The first post was on 24th January 2007.

That is 437 days ago.

The average number of posts per day is therefore 0.228833.

It looks better if you use a 5 day working week, take off bank holidays, 5 weeks annual leave and weekends. My average then is 2.7297534 posts per day.

I just thought you might be interested. Even if you do not exist.

Muslim Humour

NOT A PROPHET

I was wrong. There is some. Here are some links I found:

Islamic Humour

The Muslim Has a Sense of Humour

Islam and the Sense of Humour

Now, stop pillorying Muslims for lack of a sense of humour.

Jewish Law

I watched the Sky Three documentary on

Jewish

Law tonight. It was accepted by rabbis that the justification for certain jewish laws had long ago disappeared but some of them argued that observance was still required because it was the word of god. Pardon!

Some of the laws are utilitarian and would benefit us all if we compied with them. For instance, the thorough spring clean required every year. But when this is combined with the requirement that you eradicate all trace of leavened or fermented items from your residence it becomes absurd. One of the participants kept a special oven for use on one single day per year. Another hid leavened bead around the house to make sure thc hildren followed the law. It was a great game for the children and revealed a lot of humanity but it was humanity in the face of an absurd law.

Philip Lawrence's Killer is Still Mad

Some mad fool will kill him. His desire to stay in this country is infantile and very stupid.

Does he not realise (however reformed he may be) that there are unreformed people out there who will seek revenge?

The Real Meaning of Religion

Let me tell you a story.

It begins like this:



That's the thief on the right. Well, it's one of them. The one he told would be in paradise with him that very same day. It could not be any other day because they were both about to die. And it could have been the one on the other side anyway. It is difficult to distinguish between thieves. If his hands had not been nailed in then I suppose he could have flipped a coin. But it's pretty easy for him to do that kind of stuff in his head. Gosh, I just tried it. I can flip a coin in my head!!! You get to come to paradise with me and, oh, you on the other side, your just dead.

But they are such nice people really:

I have not bought The Satanic Verses but...

We only ban what we fear.

To threaten to kill the author takes it a step further.

I have tried to read a Rushdie book or two once (never twice). I did not get very far because they were not very good. They were too, well, Rushdie. Rushdie is, to my mind, a synonym for "boring".

He should not have been knighted. He's not a very good writer. Subject him to literary criticism by all means - even, if you have the willpower and patience, critically assassinate him. But, put a bullet in his brain because of Tony Blair's shallow literary taste! Come on!

All that has been achieved by renewal of the fatwa is to emphasise the degenerate nature of religious belief at its fundamentalist heart.

If further proof were needed that Dawkins is right, here it is. A god who believes in terrorism to enforce belief in himself is, hopefully, a contradiction in terms. But then, god is just that, a contradiction in terms.

The Judge's Underpants

In executing a breathtakingly brilliant strategy, worthy of the late George Carman QC, Sir Stephen Richard's leading counsel persuaded Sir Stephen to display his old briefs to the judge.

David Fisher QC asked the eminent Court of Appeal judge (all Court of Appeal judges are by definition eminent):

“In order to remove your penis when you’re wearing your Calvin Klein briefs, is it necessary to use one or two hands?”

To this the judge memorably replied:

“If I had a pee, I would use two hands. It is the natural way of doing it.”

This reply was, of course, fatal to the prosecution case that the judge had exposed his penis twice to a lady on the London underground.

Game, Set and Match!

I understand that the Crown Prosecution Service are immediately revising their training manual to include a completely rewritten version of the chapter on Resisting the Underpants Defence.

American defense lawyers have beseiged the UK solicitors actiing for Sir Stephen.